Relevant Musings

As evidenced in a recent blog post I read by Tony Schwarz, seen on the Oct 12 HBR Blog Network, there are many opinions about the best way to deal with difficult people, especially in the workplace and especially where leadership is concerned.

One blogger comment that I appreciated offered the idea of "not letting a difficult person rent space in your head." The idea being, we have only so much mental and emotional energy to spend each day. Is it worth it to spend your energy on the difficult person?

I believe that many times what bothers me most about difficult people is some piece of their attitude or action is a reflection of myself. Yikes, I hate when that happens. But some days, you may well decide it is time to deal with the knucklehead straight on. In that case, I agree with thoser blogger comments that suggested preparing yourself to do that well. Jumping in without advance thinking likely won't get you the result you want.

So here is my two cents worth of preparation advice, ask yourself "how will what I say or do help?" Will I be helped? Will the other person be helped? If there is little to gain by your comments or actions, decide to let it ride. But if there is a real chance to improve the negativity, by all means get yourself ready to have that conversation.

What advice do you have for dealing with difficult people?